Every time I pick up a T-shirt, all the issues resolve themselves

You suck at Dota — I'm going to check you suck a dick

Gave an old iPhone as a Christmas present and had to suck it up like a new one

So lazy to make dinner, why don't we just fuck on the table?

Didn't let me sleep on my day off, but at least I knew how to suck my dick

Eh, if everyone had sisters like that — came for a blowjob myself 😮