I told my girlfriend to fuck off and she took it too literally

Croissant and rain — that's what you need for first date sex

We love sex so much that even in the heat we can't keep our hands off each other

He distracted her by playing, and quickly poured his cum into her pink pussy

Woke up with a hard-on — good thing my sweetheart hasn't left for school yet

Still won't let me put my dick in her ass, so at least I'll put my finger in

Didn't let me sleep on my day off, but at least I knew how to suck my dick

Asked her boyfriend to film sex on camera so she could brag about it

I called the programmer and didn't get dressed — of course, he fell for it!

Not enough attention for a girl — had to put away my laptop and pull out my dick

Russian whore with very small tits gave her acquaintance over the Internet

Eh, if everyone had sisters like that — came for a blowjob myself 😮

Oh, you're such a fucker, who did you give the nudes to? I'm gonna beat the shit out of you