I got a guy with an awesome body to let me go to a rock concert

Didn't let me play The Witcher — took the keyboard and sat on top of it

Did you get socks and shower gel for February 23? I got a blowjob

Blew the guy's mind on the first day of self-isolation, but at least she sucked

Called an ambulance and had a domestic coronavirus test

Don't bullshit, let's get laid and burn calories!

Honey, are you done playing GTA 5? — just make me happy with your pussy

Come on, put Sims 4 on pause and undress, because my balls are already cramping