I wanted to cum in her face, but she has such an ass - I'm going to cum there

Don't be impertinent, or you'll get sperm all over your skirt (and I did!)

Usually sucks instead of gifts, so I gave it after the surprise - a habit

She asked me to cum on my jeans - I thought there would be less sperm

Give me a break, I just wanted to stand there, but you can fuck me, too

"Does your girlfriend mind?" — What a question, start sucking on it already

You see, I put my ass for sperm, and you got your skirt all dirty

Honey, don't forget to change your clothes or your skirt will be covered in sperm